Happy birthday to me! That’s right ladies and gentlemans, today is the 24th anniversary of my birth. 24 years ago at 4:30am, Momma Sassy brought me into the world after 2 seconds of easy labor, which I heard her describe once as feeling like “a tiny little menstrual cramp” but “not a big deal or very painful.” Those are not direct quotes even though I used quotes. But I guess easy labor is what happens when you’re in shape and give birth to a tiny pint sized baby. Maybe you’re chuckling, but really I was pint sized, weighing in at around 5 pounds, which I guess technically is more like 5 pints but whatever. PintS plural sized. But no one cares about how much I weighed 24 years ago except my mom so let’s move on.
Birthdays really are special and I super love birthdays, especially my birthday. Ha. Who doesn’t love their birthday. Actually I guess plenty of people don’t like their birthday if they don’t want to get old. Or if perhaps there is a bad memory associated with birthdays, but seriously. No other time in the year can one celebrate their own being. No other time is as good for celebrating someone else’s actual being. I think about it like this: celebrating a birthday is like affirming someone’s existence. By wishing them a happy birthday, you’re essentially saying, “hey friend, I’m glad you exist!” And who doesn’t love this kind of existence affirmation?! Like It’s a Wonderful Life. The world would be a vastly different place if you did not exist, no matter what you think or how depressed you are or how big of a pity party pit you have dug for yourself. Whenever I get down and dirty in my pity party pit, I wallow in the dirt for a few minutes (everyone loves a good pity party) and then I think about all the good things in my life (that I wouldn’t enjoy if I didn’t…exist) and it helps me climb out. Likewise, if you’re in your pity party pit (PPP? Hm.) and even those positive thoughts aren’t helping, you can take the slightly more selfish tactic and think about all the people and things you positively impact. Personal connections, volunteer work, enriching your parents’ and family’s life. It’s a fun exercise. Just don’t talk about how great you are to your friends because then you’ll seem like a self-centered douche bag. No one likes those. But everyone likes a happy, appreciative person, and today, that is what I am. Happy and appreciative. Among other things.
23 has been a great year for me. Let’s review. This year, since last June 8th, I have: spontaneously chopped all my hair off with my own pink-handled scissors. I then repeatedly chopped hair off until I was satisfied with my curly-haired homemade version of Posh’s pixie cut. Then a week later I realized it doesn’t fit my face and hated it and have been waiting for it to grow out ever since. When I was 23 I did some dumb things involving boys, numerous times. So dumb. Really, really dumb. For real. Also when I was 23 I went on an awesome cruise with my mother. I lived outside of San Francisco for 6 months. I went on a whole bunch of spontaneous road trips solo. I made a bunch of new friends out west who I will probably never see again. I planned a girls weekend. Went to NYC. Attended a bachelorette party for a close friend. When I was 23 I spent a gagillion dollars more than I should have on shoes (something I will more than likely continue to do now that I am 24). When I was 23 I realized I am no where near being ready to get married, and when I was 23 I watched a gagillion of my friends get engaged and/or married. Another trend that will continue in my 24th year. And probably my 25th, 26th, 27th, 28th, 29th, and into my 30th year and beyond. Though hopefully at some point in those years I will also be ready. No one wants to be The Single One when we’re all 40 years old. Yikes. 23 years is also the last of the “early twenties.” 23 years is the last of the college age-group. 24 and over is the graduate programs and the law schools and the med schools and the I’ve-been-working-a-long-time-and-already-got-a-promotion-and-a-family-to-feed time. Yikes / it’s exciting. Also 24 makes me the same age as my bff Le Fox. Being a different age than her makes me feel like a small child so I’m glad that’s over. Also “24” is a much more respectable number when hanging out with my primarily late-twenties to thirties friends. When asked, saying “I’m 23” always gets a response like “Awww that’s so cute! When did you graduate, like last year?! Ugh I remember 23..those were the days!” This, said by a 28-year-old is as obnoxious as it sounds but I feel like saying “I’m 24” will not garner such awkward responses. I know I’m cute, but I’m not a puppy. Though who knows. When I go out tonight to celebrate I’ll see what kind of responses I get.
Big huge mondo thanks and hugs to everyone who has called, texted, emailed, Facebooked, and g-chatted me today! It is so wonderful that we all have this one day a year to be appreciated and feel the love, and I am definitely feeling the love. Even at work, where no one knows my birthday, I feel the love. Mostly because I’m wearing a pin that says “Happy Birthday MSP!” Prompting people to say “Oh! Happy birthday!” which is extremely rewarding for me. My grandmother always said, it’s your own fault if people forget your birthday, and I aim to help everyone out. So, thanks to everyone who didn’t forget me. I love you all dearly. And to those of you who did forget me, my pin will remind you. I’m blessed to be surrounded by such love!