(S)He Doesn’t Like You, Part II: Tell Me Whyee, Ain’t Nothing But A Heartache

Tell me whyee, ain’t nothing but a missssstake, tell me whyee I never wanna heeear you sayyyy, IIIIII want it thaaaaat way! Flashback to 1999 when famed Backstreet Boys released this song and went on to be nominated for 3 Grammys (!!) and a won bunch of other ridiculous awards and nonsense for this crazy catchy but annoying song. Totally not related to this post but holy crap what a flashback. I remember feuding with my bff Talulah over which was better, NSync* or Backstreet Boys. To this day I maintain that NSync was better, but now in hindsight I know that Boyz II Men were better than both. Obvs. And I still listen to them and my boyz Jagged Edge on the reg. L. O. V. E.

MOVING ON to the point of this stupid post. It’s the second addition of (S)He Doesn’t Like You! Last week, we heard a story about how MSP got dumped over a period of a couple weeks because she/I refused to see the signs. But seriously, I thought he was busy. Not my fault that I believe a man when he says he’s busy. But it is my fault for believing a man who says he’s busy 24/7 and has no time for this here total package (you’re all the total package, girls, never forget!).

Our first Mexpert (remember, Men + Expert = Mexpert, and not related to Mexican anything), who will remain nameless and anonymous so much that I am not even giving him a nickname (crazy talk!), weighs in on how guys can be SO busy ALL the time:

It is absolutely true that some guys will give excuses to “excuse” themselves from the relationship because they’re not that interested.  It happens all the time.  Guys will use the “too much work” excuse on girls, not because it’s necessarily true, but because it’s such an easy excuse.

But what if he really is busy…how do we know the difference??

Sure sometimes work is going to get in the way, or something truly came up that is a legit excuse. But get the point where he does it all the time, then he’s not that interested in you.  You want to know a secret?

YES! We LOVE secrets!

If a guy truly had something come up, and he cannot make it out with you that night, if he’s interested, he will always say “…but let’s figure out another time to meet up”.  If he just gives you the, “sorry, I’m busy,” then he’s not interested in you because he’s not making plans to see you again.  Simple as that.

You’re so right, nameless Mexpert! It’s so simple! I feel like I have stated this before in previous posts, HOWEVER isn’t it so much more credible coming from an actual man, who goes on actual dates with actual girls, and actually rejects girls on the reg. One thing I can share about this nameless Mexpert is that he has a way with the ladies. Seriously.

I believe Mr. Nameless has indeed answered our question, why men cannot just come out and say it. It still doesn’t explain why dude from my previous post and past dating life needed to shell out extra cash to feed me when he really didn’t want to see me anymore. I don’t want to share a burrito with you that badly. But it totally explains why he was so busy and unwilling to make plans too far in the future with my little planning extraordinaire self. Perhaps, and I’m just supposing here, he wanted closure as much as I did, and that last luncheon was his way of saying goodbye, albeit in a way that didn’t sound or look or act remotely like goodbye. Any Mexpert want to weigh in?

So hopefully we are on our way to proving to all you haters out there that, seriously, it’s not that he’s too busy! He really doesn’t like you! Next week we will examine additional red flags of the early dating stages, and remind everyone of the difference between and explanation and an excuse. Head’s up: One is preferred and one makes MSP say, “BRNT, try again.” Extra love points to those of you smart enough to know the difference!

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One response to “(S)He Doesn’t Like You, Part II: Tell Me Whyee, Ain’t Nothing But A Heartache

  1. touching down in the friendzone

    as an expert in rejection (yeah the latest one didn’t work out…), if you aren’t totally into someone after first meeting them, it probably just isn’t going to work.

    i knew it wasn’t going to work after first meeting her, but it’s tough to let it go (the five phone call, 10 txt message investment is significant in my world). it’s not that i actually liked her that much, i just wanted her to like me. so, i only have myself to blame.

    wow. that. was. cathartic.

    “there’s no celebrating in the friendzone” –vince lombardi

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