BRNT. What does that even mean?

BRNT. You may have heard Miss Sassy Pants use this..uh, word, many times, and thought to youself, “What the heck does that even mean??” Well pals and gals, I’m here to learn you.

First, I have to give credit where credit is due.  I am not such a pop culture or buzz word genius that I came up with this all on my own.  I’m original maybe about half the time, and the other half I shamelessly copy other people’s originality (typically I get approval for this, provide a verbal bibliography, or wait until they’re not around to witness it, duh).  This I copied from my beautiful sophomore year roommate, Roomz.  She had all these cool words and phrases that she regularly used in her speech and so of course, living with her, I eventually picked up on them, being the good and faithful copycat that I am.  So I start using brnt in sentences regularly with her and with our other roommates, then I start using it with other friends, and before I know it, I’ve practically adopted it as my own thing.  Eventually, I was the only one of all the 6 roommates that still used it, and I was the annoying one.  This is common for me I think, but in the interest of keeping friends, I have slowly and diligently worked on using it less often and in more appropriate instances.  But what is an appropriate instance?  I will tell you my take on it, and hope that Roomz would approve.

Brnt is very versatile and can be used in a variety of situations.  Awkwardness was the original main usage. For example, let’s say you’re walking with a friend around the mall and you pass a couple who is violently arguing in the middle of the sidewalk.  Very awkward situation, no?  You might then turn to your friend and say, “Brnt!”  Or perhaps you’re in a bar and happen to witness a cougar attempting to pick up a young boy less than half her age who is unsuccessfully trying to escape (we’ve all witnessed it, it’s typically not smooth).  This is extremely awkward and it would definitely be appropriate to say to anyone else present, “uh, Brnt,” and even display your judgmental face.  Please note also that it is not “burnt,” as in, “damn, I burnt my pizza!”  However you could use brnt in that situation to express dismay or call yourself out for being clumsy or forgetful: “Brnt, I burned my pizza!”  Nor is brnt meant to refer to someone as “burned,” as in, “you got burnt!”  Alternatively, brnt can be used to convey to someone that you absolutely do not want to do something.  Example: “Miss Sassy Pants, do you want to go to the gym with me at 5:30am tomorrow?”  I would say, “uh, BRNT. That will never happen.”  This not only expresses that, no, I am not available to exercise with you at 5:30am, but also I am never available to do anything ever at 5:30am, and typically I do not exercise.  Other appropriate brnt-worthy situations include, but are not limited to:

  • bad grades
  • bad / awkward meetings at work
  • awkward / inappropriate witnessing or encounters in public places such as the grocery store
  • clumsy personal experiences e.g. tripping in public
  • awkward personal encounters in public places e.g. being on the receiving end of terrible pick-up lines
  • forgetting people’s names
  • bad movies
  • whenever the mood strikes you

Are we beginning to pick up on this? Also of note is the distinction between “brnt,” “BRNT,” and “brrrrrrrrrnt.”  I know, we’re nitpicking now, but the distinction is important. If a situation is only moderately awkward, then you would use the less extreme version of  brnt. Just like if a joke is only chuckle worthy, you would not burst into hilarity because then you would be the only one laughing and people will stare at you and think you’re weird.  And if that ever happens to you, your friends could look at each other and say, “Brnt.”

So I think I have sufficiently cleared the air on this.  The one thing we should all remember when using this word is to always be confident in your usage.  Own it!  Make it yours! And most importantly, be sassy with it…because I sure am.

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